Relying on the same awful gag as the first trailer, and including a whole lot of unconvincing visual effects and facepalm-inducing advertisements for ’4-D,’ Spy Kids: All The Time In The World might not be worth your time after all. Do ho ho!

See it in August. Jessica Alba plays the mum, Ricky Gervais plays the dog, annoying children play the annoying children.

Prepare to weep for the death of a horse (likely, I’m only guessing here…) after it saves the hero in the final reel of what appears to be a heartwarming Oscar wink from Steven Spielberg. Horse shit stinks. You gotta really love an animal to put up with that stink.

War Horse releases in December, perfect for that popular Christmas Holiday family movie Oscar run.

Much like the first teaser of Paul W.S. Anderson’s 3D ‘epic’ The Three Musketeers (thank fuck it’s not called ‘The 3D Musketeers’, eh?), everything appears too modern and shiny for something set back in the day. There are certain elements of traditional filmmaking that should be brought to a traditional story like this. Instead, it looks and acts like one of those intolerable Resident Evil films.

Brad Bird‘s first live-action feature certainly looks like a barrel of monkeys; there are a lot of neat visual ideas in these two minutes alone. Shame about that guy rapping in the background.

Due December 2011, in regular cinemas as well as Imax enorm-o-vision.

While the world cringes at Cars 2 (and kids point to the screen in anticipation of they new toys they can buy), Pixar have moved quickly to wash the unsavory taste out the mouths of fans by feeding them this sweet teaser for their upcoming feature, Brave.

Horrible Bosses looks like the kind of movie that will make people laugh. Especially the Colin Farrell scenes. There are a couple of new chuckle-worthy moments in this extend-o-trailer, but my ticket was sold when I saw the original, green-band trailer.

Due 8 July in the States, 25 August here.

Even when he’s tied to a chair, Jason Statham is an unstoppable killing machine. Hilarious. Clive Owen plays the baddie, Robert DeNiro plays some old dude, and if you look real close, you might catch a glimpse of Aussie Yvonne Strahovsky. Given the surprisingly agreeable cast, and Clive Owen’s funny mustache, I’m actually quite keen to see this one.

Due in the US on 23 September 2011.

It’s a little bit unsettling, but a lot exciting. If you’ve ever wanted to see Michael Fassbender spank Keira Knightley, here’s your chance.

Due February 2012 in the UK. If you cross your fingers and wish real hard, we might get it before the end of the year.