SPIDER-MAN 4 scrapped in favour of franchise reboot

Hollywood is officially broken. After a recent flurry of casting rumours (Anne Hathaway, John Malkovich as new villains), delays, script problems and fan plot speculation regarding the planned fourth, fifth and sixth Spidey flicks, Sam Raimi has finally had enough of Sony’s shit, and has officially left the building, taking with him Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, the heart and soul of the films, and any sense of dignity the series might once have had. I was doing my daily news rounds, saw a little piece on Malkovich publicly confirming his involvement in Spidey 4, and then BAM — a headline about Spider-Man 4 being unceremoniously let go.

Deadline brings us the bad news.

You’ve got to wonder what Sony was thinking. Until The Dark Knight came out, Spider-Man 3 was the highest-grossing superhero film of all time, despite its mixed reception. If I was Sony, I’d let Raimi loose on the fourth film, maybe with the mandate to pare down the number of villains introduced. I’d try to keep intact and nurture the creative team behind the first three films. I’d plan on turning a dime by putting the same names on the poster as I did the last three times. I wouldn’t reboot the freaking series.

I don’t want a reboot at all. I don’t want to have to go through Peter Parker’s formative high school character-building sequence again just to get to the web-slinging, heart-breaking action. I don’t want to have to put up with someone who isn’t Tobey Maguire filling the shoes, I’d feel guilty and awkward. I’ve grown attached to Maguire as dorky Peter, and anyone else in the role would just feel like a whole different character. And who would they get to direct? Brett Ratner? God save us all.

Anyway this reboot is due in northern hemisphere summer 2012, by which time we’ll have had Iron Man 2, The Avengers, Captain America, Nick Fury, Thor, The Fantastic Four (another, more reasonable reboot), X-Men: First Class, as well as The Green Lantern, Jonah Hex, and god knows how many more Marvel / DC superhero flicks. The world’s gonna burnt be out on over-the-top action and ordinary people fighting extraordinary fights. You’d think around this time we’d be hankering for a revival of the feeling that for many people started the superhero movie craze: the perfect time for a good old-fashioned Spidey sequel.

Sure I’m taking this a lot more sensitively because I literally just watched all three Raimi-helmed Spider-Man flicks, but I don’t think I’m being too unreasonable here. It’s like Bryan Singer leaving the X-Men movies — oh wait, he did that. Okay, it’s like Peter Jackson not directing The Hobbit — oh wait … It’s like James Cameron not finishing off the Terminator movies — damn it! It’s like Steven Spielberg walking away from Jurassic Park — argh!

Okay, okay, I should have seen this coming. But seriously, sometimes Hollywood is a stupid, stupid place.