Frank Miller’s GUCCI GUILTY commercial starring Evan Rachel Wood and Chris Evans
Aug 24
Seems Frank Miller has found the format that helps his insistent graphic-novel-style work: 30 second commercials. This one is for Gucci Guilty and stars Evan Rachel Wood (The Wrestler) and Chris Evans (Fantastic Four) and will premiere on TV during the MTV Movie Awards in September.
The style will remind you of Sin City, which Robert Rodriguez wonderfully adapted from Miller’s popular graphic novel of the same name. While we waited patiently for Sin City 2 (if that’ll ever happen), Miller tried to kill us all by using the same style in The Spirit, which was a spectacular failure.
If you can ‘return to form’ in a 30 second commercial, I guess this is it, because I found it sexy, engaging and effective. Watch it embedded below.
SPLICE review
Aug 19
Splice is unsure of itself from the opening frame. The opening credits are distracting, redundant, and poorly rendered – symptoms of which the rest of the movie is sadly guilty, too. There are some interesting themes floating around in the script, but director Vincenzo Natali (Cube) doesn’t quite know which ones to focus on, which ones to push into the background, and which ones to cut entirely.
The characters are unsympathetic and hurt the plot more than they should. The two main characters, played by a solid Adrien Brody and a patchy Sarah Polley, are inconsistent in their actions and completely mysterious in their motivations. For a small-scale sci-fi that focuses more on character than action, this is bad news.
The idea of genetic experimentation is treated inconsistently as well. As part of the film’s back-story, scientists magically combine DNA from various barnyard animals to create an amorphous blob that serves as a medicinal protein factory; creating a locomotive organism from bits and pieces of various other organism is pushing the envelope of plausibility as it is, but then, when the scientists add just one sequence of human DNA into the mix, the result miraculously looks 99% human – it’s easy enough to forgive some storytelling liberties, but Dren’s human appearance is a bit too much of a stretch for me.
Also ridiculous is the “she ages days in minutes” device slapped onto Dren. For the first half of the movie, she’s shown in various stages of development, from infant to adolescent, but then, about halfway through, Dren’s supernatural ageing conveniently halts at just the right level of development for Adrien Brody’s character to find her sexually attractive.
It’s shortcuts like this – jumping from amorphous blobs to human forms, dropping the rapid growth idea when it becomes inconvenient – that betray Splice for what it is. It’s clear that the story-writers (director Vincenzo Natali, along with Antoinette Terry Bryant) had a couple of half-decent third-act ideas, but had no idea how to build a supporting first and second act to get there.
A dark streak permeates the plot, an aspect that probably would have helped the film if it had stronger characters, but in reality serves to alienate the audience from what little good Splice has to offer. Film classifications should probably warn of rape scenes, too, especially when such deeply traumatic experiences are treated as glibly as they are in Splice. Make no mistake, Splice is an ugly film.
For the first half or so, before the film completely runs off the rails, the plot is mildly engaging. There are quite a few different themes going on at once, but, thanks to the film’s leisurely pace, they never seem cluttered or confusing. It’s a shame that none of them pays off properly, but, while it lasts, the film’s first half is relatively enjoyable.
But when the second half kicks in, it all gets a bit silly. Unsure of how to deal with underdeveloped side-characters who know too much, the script simply has them killed. Unsure of how to give one of the central characters strong motivation, the film spends too long on a subplot / back-story that has no direct effect on the action. Unsure of how to underline Dren’s alienness, the script throws a couple of goofy-looking insect wings onto her arms. And then it gets really ridiculous towards the end.
The script’s biggest crime, though, is its uncertainty in dealing with Dren. Despite looking 99% human and displaying cognitive linguistic ability, the script prevents her from speaking, probably to emphasise her non-humanness. Either too lazy to follow through on the plot idea, or mistakenly enamoured of their characters, the screenwriters opt to trap Dren in the family barn, hidden from public view, rather than show her to the world and gauge the reaction.
If they’d followed through on that idea, the film could have become more like the Frankenstein story it’s already channelling, and more compelling as a drama. If Dren had become a sought-after celebrity, a curiosity and a wonder of science, maybe then the characters’ in-fighting and jealousy could have played out in an interesting way. As it is, the worst thing that can happen to the main characters is that they could die, and as far as the audience is concerned, that wouldn’t be such a bad thing.
The script needed more work before going into production; that much is clear. Performances could have been tightened, too, as quite a few of them are weak or one-dimensional; Dren especially seems awkwardly over-the-top at times. The plot, too, could have done with a major overhaul, and the characters could have been represented in a more consistent light.
Nevertheless, there is – somewhere – a half-decent premise in Splice. While the ethical implications of cloning are largely glossed over by the script, it’s enough to get the audience thinking. The dark Oedipal / Freudian themes alluded to, and the clothes-off sexy-time promised by the trailers, might titillate some. But I think most people will find Splice too bitter a pill to swallow, too ugly an experience to enjoy, and too hollow a film to watch more than once – and that’s just about the worst thing you can say about a movie: that you’ll never watch it again. It’s a shame, because Splice was almost interesting – almost.
Splice
First trailer for Darren Aronofsky’s BLACK SWAN shows Natalie Portman going mental
Aug 18
Darren Aronofsky‘s much-anticipated follow-up to The Wrestler finally has a trailer. Black Swan stars Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel and Winona Ryder, and appears ready to put all those pesky little dance films to shame with its ominous, dark tone.
Thankfully I knew nothing of the plot before sitting down to this trailer, so it had the required crazy and intense effect one me. Looks like Aronofsky has gone back to his sublime, mind-fucking best for this one. I don’t think I’ve ever looked forward to a dance movie before.
Black Swan is playing at the Toronto International Film Festival in September before a 1 December, 2010 release in the U.S. Other territories will follow, but no dates have been announced.
Black Swan follows the story of Nina (Portman), a ballerina in a New York City ballet company whose life, like all those in her profession, is completely consumed with dance. She lives with her retired ballerina mother Erica (Barbara Hershey) who zealously supports her daughter’s professional ambition. When artistic director Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel) decides to replace prima ballerina Beth MacIntyre (Winona Ryder) for the opening production of their new season, Swan Lake, Nina is his first choice. But Nina has competition: a new dancer, Lily (Kunis), who impresses Leroy as well. Swan Lake requires a dancer who can play both the White Swan with innocence and grace, and the Black Swan, who represents guile and sensuality. Nina fits the White Swan role perfectly but Lily is the personification of the Black Swan. As the two young dancers expand their rivalry into a twisted friendship, Nina begins to get more in touch with her dark side with a recklessness that threatens to destroy her.
Call Sheet: Reese Witherspoon as Peggy Lee, Sam Worthington in COMMANDO, John Belushi biopic, Bugs Bunny returns, plus Anne Hathaway, Gerard Butler, Ben Affleck and ENTOURAGE
Aug 16
A tidy and brief Call Sheet this week:
Variety revealed Oscar winner Reese Witherspoon will play late American jazz singer and actress Peggy Lee (whose career spans nearly seven decades) in a new biopic. She’s also producing the film while Nora Ephron (Jule & Julia, Sleepless in Seattle) will write and direct. Sounds like a possible award-winning combo to me.
Newsinfilm reports Australia’s own Sam Worthington is attached to star in the 20th Century Fox remake of Commando which has been re-written by David Ayer (Training Day). I don’t see it. I’d much rather see someone like Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson take the reins in this kind of film.
The Wrap reports Ben Affleck and Rachel Weisz have joined the still-untitled project for director Terrence Malick (The Thin Red Line). The film already stars Christian Bale, Javier Bardem, Rachel McAdams and Olga Kurylenko.
Deadline revealed Warner Brothers have hired David Berenbaum (Elf) to write a new live action Bugs Bunny movie. Don’t get too excited… it’ll be another ‘hybrid’ kids film, in the same style as Alvin And The Chipmunks, Garfield and the upcoming Smurfs and Yogi Bear. Space Jam, anyone?
Hollywood Reporter announced Todd Phillips (The Hangover) is developing a biopic about legendary funnyman John Belushi after Warner Brothers purchased the rights to do so. Steven Conrad (The Pursuit Of Happiness) is writing the screenplay and will produce with Phillips. A director hasn’t been announced. Let’s hope they don’t fuck up by casting Seth Rogen as Belushi. You just know that card has been on the table.
According to Variety, Adrien Brody is going to star as a high school teacher in Detachment, co-starring Marcia Gay Harden, Christina Hendricks, Blythe Danner and James Caan.
24 Frames reported Gerard Butler has attached himself to star in a soccer movie titled Slide (as in slide tackle? I dunno…) Butler will play a troubled father trying to make up for lost time by coaching his son’s soccer team, but then finds himself in hot water after some of the local mothers take a little too much of a shine to him (and he to them). Sounds like he’ll be getting buff again, like in 300. OK maybe not that buff.
According to Heat Vision, the granddaughter of Elvis Presley, Riley Keough (The Runaways), has joined the cast of George Miller’s Mad Max: Fury Road starring Tom Hardy (as the new Max), Nicholas Hoult and Charlize Theron. Fury Road films Down Under next year, in 3D.
HBO has announced (via Deadline) that TV show Entourage will enjoy a final six episodes next year (its eighth season) followed by a feature film to complete the show for good. I’m all for this. Of all the TV shows turned into movies, Entourage makes the most sense.
Variety reports Warner Brothers are moving ahead with a sequel for Green Lantern (yes, already) by hiring writer Michael Goldenberg (Contact, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix) to get the screenplay underway. Goldenberg also did a rewrite on Green Lantern, which has just wrapped production and will be released June 2011.
Finally, Deadline reports Fox Searchlight bought a comedy pitch titled Motherf***er, being scripted and directed by Daryl Wein and co-scripted by Zoe Lister Jones. This is news because? Anne Hathaway is already attached to star. Here’s a pic!
STAR WARS finally gets a Blu-Ray release — in 2011
Aug 16
At Star Wars Celebration V, which, I gather, is some kind of celebration of Star Wars, it was announced by George Lucas himself that every geek’s favourite movies in the history of the world are finally being released on Blu-Ray, the highest-def medium currently available to mortals.
Don’t get too excited, though, because it’s the 1997 special edition re-release that’s getting scanned and sold to us, not the elusive and nostalgia-inducing original originals. All six films will be available simultaneously, but you can bet that the prequel trilogy will act as little more than a tech demo to show off surround sound systems and 1080p TVs to friends, because they’re, you know, awful.
Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher themselves were on hand at Celebration for the announcement, and introduced a brand new and potentially pants-soilingly exciting deleted scene (embedded below). Carrie Fisher made a joke about “Did you put the nude scenes back in?” to George, following it up with “There was a huge me and Jabba porn scene. That’s what got me into drugs.” The audience had to change their pants again.
I haven’t actually watched any of the Star Wars films since I first got the DVDs several years ago, so it’ll be good to return to a world so familiar and nostalgic when the Blu-Rays roll around. Heck, I might even watch the prequels! But probably not.
The Star Wars double-trilogy, along with various exciting deleted scenes and making-of docos, is due in “Fall 2011.” Fall is what Americans call Autumn, because that’s when the leaves Fall down (imaginitive, eh?), and their Autumn corresponds to our Spring. So, the Star Wars Blu-Rays are due sometime in September – November 2011.
THE EXPENDABLES review
Aug 14
There’s only so much tolerance I can have for a film that misfired on what it aimed to achieve (see what I did there?). The Expendables wanted to bring big action back to the big screen, recalling the glory days of Stallone and company. What it needed to do was rise above those glory days and usher something refreshing and new while giving those classic actioners a wink from behind the lens. To become what everyone anticipated was possible—a new beginning in the action genre, OR the ultimate, most brilliant ensemble action film ever made—The Expendables needed to do a hell of a lot more than just follow the blue print from the 80s. It’s a shame it didn’t follow through.
It’s all here. Big guns, big fights, big arms, square jaws, car chases, explosions, sexy ladies in distress and, of course, witty one-liners. There’s even a bad guy ‘monologing’ at the end to complete the package. It’s all been done before and there’s nothing revolutionary for The Expendables to hang its hat on.
That’s not to say this celebration of testosterone needed to be anything more than it is. For the blokes, the burly men who only go to the cinema on very rare occasions, the action delivered in The Expendables is all they require. I’m pretty sure the home DVD and television markets are geared for this audience in particular. They can pause this whenever they want, take a phone call, miss entire chunks of the film and catch up to what’s going on in about 1 minute and totally not give a fuck. I don’t know if that’s incredibly stupid or remarkably clever.
The plot is a no-brainer: army of bad guys in a foreign country, go kill em, save the girl, blow everything to smithereens in the process. Hell, use a plane to explode a dock if you have to, just blow shit up.
What made this film so attractive and promising was the cast. If I’m to believe the trailer, this was going to bring action heavyweights Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Willis, Lundgren, Li and Rourke together for one seriously explosive party. One could rightly feel ripped off that Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger make one-scene cameos and don’t have anything much to do with the overall film. Thankfully I knew this was the case before taking my seat, but I’m guessing the majority of this film’s target audience would take the trailer on face value.
The real lead cast here is Sylvester Stallone (also co-writer and director), Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren and Jet Li. They each do what is required, nothing more. Who needs drama when you’ve got arms the size of trucks and silky-smooth, perfectly choreographed martial arts skills?
Sly is that gritty guy you’ve seen before. Needs a shave, slurs when he speaks, smokes a cigar and becomes the hero of the movie by overcoming the odds to save the girl (no, no spoiler warning for you—it’s plain as day, people).
‘Who really cares?’ kind of spoilers in this para: Statham gets by on his charm and accent, and is even given the handy Storyline-B part of the script where he fancies a girl for a scene and proves his love to her by beating the shit out of a basketball team in another. The last time we see her or hear anything about the relationship is at around the 70 minute mark of the film. This entire B-plot is completely useless.
REAL spoilers in this para: Dolph’s character was very lost and a glaring misstep for an already weak script. He goes against the group from the very opening act, is kicked out, betrays them, gets shot by Sly in a big confrontation, survives, and winds up chummy with the gang again in the final scene. Like, fuck you, Expendables! I may be stupid but I’m not that stoopid.
Mickey Rourke had a chance to act (you know, really act, not just run, punch and shoot shit) when he delivered a monologue about a life he could have saved, but didn’t. This scene was supposed to underline the theme of the movie, which I think is ‘don’t let regret have a chance to get the better of you’, and I’m certain was written as an afterthought to the guns, blood and explosions. But again, that’s okay because that’s what this audience paid to see: Guns, blood and explosions. And baby, The Expendables definitely delivers on those.
It was entertainingly violent, yes. No denying that. Some of the kills are very impressively choreographed—but also incredibly fake, often beyond believability. The choice to seemingly have no blood on set and re-create splatters digitally was a poor one; especially considering how advanced CGI effects are these days. The fake digitized gore in every big action scene cheapened film even further.
The Expendables tries to keep its cardboard characters witty and charming, but most of the humour fell on deaf ears in my particular (full) cinema. I must admit I laughed aloud once: when Stallone gustily referred to Stone Cold Steve Austin’s hairdresser (Steve Austin is bald, you see. Hilarious). Now, I laughed out loud like a jackass, and so did the rest of the audience, but I can’t help thinking we laughed at that moment because it was so awfully lame and uncomfortable; and for all the film was trying to do, we felt like we had better give a little back at that point in time. We felt obligated.
The testosterone is dripping from the screen from the opening shot of The Expendables, and doesn’t stop dripping until the final frame (save for Rourke’s attempt at a weeping monologue right in the middle of a fucking action film and a girly closing poem from Staham). Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like this kind of action movie isn’t around anymore because audiences grew weary of a genre becoming more and more insulting to their intelligence. I know that’s certainly the case in my book.
Ultimately, The Expendables is nothing more than a forgettable action film. And that’s fair, because that’s all it ever set out to be.
The Expendables
OPINIONS COUNT